Be careful what you put down your trousers (From South Wales Argus)

Be careful what you put down your trousers

3:50pm Friday 6th February 2009

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Now there are certain things that should or shouldn't be put down your trousers.

The things that should be could be included on a list that would be small enough to write on the back of a fag packet, or in these healthy living times the back of a packet of low calorie sawdust.

The things that shouldn't be slipped down there probably make up quite a large list and would certainly include somewhere along the line, a pigeon.

Step forward an un-named (well he would be wouldn't he?) fella who has had his collar felt after trying to smuggle not one but two pigeons into Australia by concealing them in his trousers.

Well a pair's a nice even number, a solo pigeon would get a bit lonely on his own and maybe look around for something to keep him entertained on a long flight.

Please feel free to use your imagination to complete the picture, it's not pleasant and in most cases ends in a trip to casualty with an embarrassed look on your face muttering a frankly implausible story about "walking into a door".

You have to feel sorry for the birds though.

Even though most of us will have experienced flights that were uncomfortable and unpleasant nothing can surely compare with being trussed up in a jiffy bag and thrust down the trousers of some Aussie bloke.

Reports say that the birds were unharmed but have started to have funny turn whenever they hear Kylie on the radio.

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