A MUM from Blaenau Gwent is on a mission to encourage more people to talk about their wishes for after they die - including for their final-send off.

Nicole Tagger, 41, from Six Bells, is a civil celebrant - someone who carries out non-traditional funerals, as well as weddings and other ceremonies.

She said she had been inspired to become a celebrant following the death of a close friend.

South Wales Argus:

(Nicola Tagger is a professional celebrant and wants people to understand there are options and to talk to your family about your funeral)

She said: “A friend of mine had terminal cancer at just 33 and she found it hard to express her wishes and feelings to her family.

“I used to go and visit her and sat down with her one day and wrote a card to each of her parents with what she wanted to say to them. I also offered to help arrange her funeral and we had a lovely celebration. It was obviously a sad occasion, but it was nice and what she would have wanted.”

When Ms Tagger moved back to Wales with her three young children, she found it difficult to find work - until a job centre advisor gave her some much-needed inspiration.

“I had just finished my chaplaincy training but struggled to find a job," she said. "I felt that although I am a Christian, being in a church wasn’t right for me, I wanted to be out among the people who may need help.

“One of the advisors at the job centre explained how her husband had passed away recently and they had felt forced to have a religious funeral, despite not being religious, as they thought there was no other option.

“In Bristol, there are a lot of ‘unconventional’ funerals, but it seems to not be known here. You can have a funeral anywhere if you get permission. I officiated one in a pub recently.”

In February this year, she underwent a training course and became qualified as a celebrant. She knew from the start that funerals were where she wanted to specialise due to her past experiences in palliative care.

“The leaders on the course told me that I already knew most of the stuff and that they just needed to teach me the protocols and etiquette of being a celebrant,” she said.

Ms Tagger, who works alongside T.J Brown and Sons funeral directors in Brynmawr, and is the first person in Blaenau Gwent to join up to Living Funerals – a new service pairing people up with celebrants in their area who can help them plan their funeral and explain their wishes to their loved ones.

“I want people to be aware of the options that are available to them and to have the best service possible," she said. "Every family is different and so a funeral should show that. We all have a plan that is unique to us. If I did a child’s funeral and found that the child loved dinosaurs, I would love to dress up as a T-Rex for the service. It is always going to be a sad time, but it should also reflect the person.”

Ms Tagger takes her job seriously. She only takes on three services a week, with the occasional exception. She feels that if she took more on, she would not be able to give the personal touch that she gives.

“I spend hours researching the life of the person and things like ‘what was weather like on the day they were born? Were there any royal birthdays?’ and so on. I find that this adds a special touch.”

“Death levels all of us. It doesn’t matter who you thought you were in life; it’s how you’re remembered.”

Ms Tagger is available for funerals, weddings, vow renewals, baby namings and more services through her ‘Sincerely Yours’ company.